So as you all know, when women reach a beautiful age of 40 years old our family Doctors recommend that we get our 1st Mammogram. That contraption that is cold, noisy, big and lets face it kind of scary. It's a machine that brings out our most vulnerable core in any woman. It makes you fear what they might find, if any thing.
You know that scene in the movie, "This is 40." where the main character get's her mammogram and she makes sounds of complaints that it hurts to get your breast flattened like a " pancake"? Well if you have never had one before, that's is what it is like. However, I don't think it's all that bad. Maybe I have a high tolerance for pain. I even tell jokes with the nurse who is taking the pictures and " man handling " my breast like it's play-dough. Laughter is the best medicine in at situation where most feel uncomfortable and vulnerable. It makes us human, it makes us real and lightens the mood for everyone in the room.
The Breast Cancer Society of BC is amazing. The staff, nurses and Doctors at Jim Patterson Pavilion are kind, caring. To do the job they do, you have to be compassionate, and to be able to hold your facial expressions as they can only say the standard, " Your family Doctor will contact you in a few weeks with your results from today's scans." To me, that is the most dreaded moment, the not knowing anything. You feel left in the dark from that moment on wards till you get a phone call. You feel like your life is standing still, your " holding " your breath as you want to hear that there is nothing on that scan.
Back in August 2014, I went for my 1st Mammogram. It was routine, fill out the health questionnaire forms. Put the hospital gown on and wait for them to call my name. You sit there in the waiting area, looking at the other women in their with you and knowing that at least one of you will be diagnosed with Breast Cancer. It's a very scary thought. The survival rate has increased so much from even when my Mom was diagnosed back in 1998 and she's a survivor and is with me today and I thank the powers that be, that is she still here with me and was able to see me get married, have kids and now be my support system should I be that one women in the waiting room who gets that call saying, " Hello Mrs. L..... we need you to come in and see the Oncologist." I got that phone call last August.
I laughed and I cried. I got of the phone and called my husband right away and then my mom. Still not knowing what they had found, but they found something. I am a glass is half full kinda gal, but that phone call made me a glass is half empty gal in a heart beat. They found a growth on my lymph node and so far it isn't Cancer, but I need a follow up in 6 months. Today was that 6 months I now have to do that waiting game again to see if there is any change. I'm crossing my fingers that all is good, but my glass is half empty gal is creeping back to the front again. I will deal with what ever that next phone call will be and face it head on be it good or bad news, but i am ready and willing to fight.
So Ladies go get that Mammogram today if you have been putting it off, don't let the 5 minutes of discomfort be what holds you back from keeping you and your breasts healthy.
Love,
NYTS
Thursday, 26 March 2015
Thursday, 19 March 2015
Living life to the fullest and that means wearing a bikini too.
Oh the Big Island of Hawaii. Your lapping waves, sea foam from a crashing waves, the colours of your ocean, the breeze through your palm trees and the warm sun kissing my skin with colour. My soul has craved this very feeling for so long, after living on the wet west coast of BC. I love where I live, but the sounds, smells and tastes of Hawaii, they are something special. Not everyone in the world will have a chance to go there and see it's still mostly untouched land and lush landscape and lava flow paths all the way down to the Pacific Ocean where it keeps growing the island to a bigger space and size.
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Living life to the fullest is something I have been putting on hold for so long. When I was younger the old saying," Go big or go home." was my motto as well as, " If you don't like what you see, then look the other way and walk." As we get older, we tend to loose our free spirit selves in the shuffle of being a grown up, getting married, having kids, buying a house and living life on "autopilot". This trip was my wake up call to getting back to the old me, but the 2.0 version, smarter, wiser, different outlook on life and with a few more dollars in the bank to cushion the trip to make it a dream vacation with my family.
We stayed at the Fairmont Orchid, Hawaii. A stunning resort that was worth the every penny. This as a splurge resort for us as we usually do a Disney trip, so we thought why not stay at a high end resort for our family vacation, but stay in a regular room with a garden view as we would see the ocean every day at the beach or by the pool. Step #1 in my living life to the fullest as I have always wanted to see how the other side of life lives staying at really nice hotels. You only live once right? Right, eat, sleep, drink and be merry and do it in Hawaii on the beach.
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Photo by S. Lutzer
This trip was also another BIG turning point for me personally. Step #2. I like many other women out there feel not so attractive in the eyes of the media. So I rocked my bad ass self in a bikini. I wore a bikini for the 1st time in public in 15 years. Yes, you read that right. I am no size "0" however I love myself to much not to be a healthy role model for my daughter. I want to her see the beauty in all women, no matter what their size, shape, colour or scars they have. I want her to love who she is inside and out and to love others with the same respect and passion. Love your body and love yourself and the world will keep on turning. Now, at the hot tub I was feeling confident and happy, but that changed in a few seconds after I over heard a man who was getting out of the hot tub look at me and in quite voice thinking I wouldn't hear him say, " Nasty". Well, my heart sunk faster than the Titanic and my confidence was shot and all my self loathing voices came back with a vengeance. I would usually say something back, but his one word made me feel small and ugly. Here I am trying to instill in my daughter confidence and tell her all are beautiful and then there is someone who has no clue who I am say something so cold and mean.
Step #3. I think I look great, I know I rocked it, I know I have a belly, I know I have big thighs, I know I have stretch marks and cellulite, but I am still beautiful, strong, intelligent and brave, I had my pity party for 1 for 2 minutes. I gave myself time to process what had just happened. In the end my resolve was that he was the " Nasty" one not me. I'm living my life to the fullest!
My daughter said something to me on the trip I will always hold dear to my heart. She told me, " Mom, all the things you think are " ugly" are what make you beautiful." My heart swelled with pride and love. I think I'm doing something right in raising my kids, they are going to turn out all right. They are the new generation we have to rely upon for kindness, love and respect. How they see others and them selves is via our own reflection and views. So lets start now and have them live life by being true to your selves as they learn from us in the end.
Living life to the fullest is facing your fears, your doubts, your own self loathing and battling the ugly world out there. It's doing things you thought you couldn't do. Its wearing a bikini for the 1st time in 15 years, it's building up the courage to shake off the rude people in the world. Love who you are, your flaws, your individual beauty. Be a role model to someone, be fierce, be bold, be fabulous, be sexy, be funny, be YOU!!! So put your toes in the sand, soak up the sun and drink a Mai Tai, they are amazing!! Be Naturally Your True Self and the world will keep on rolling.
Love,
Me.
Photo by S. Lutzer
Living life to the fullest is something I have been putting on hold for so long. When I was younger the old saying," Go big or go home." was my motto as well as, " If you don't like what you see, then look the other way and walk." As we get older, we tend to loose our free spirit selves in the shuffle of being a grown up, getting married, having kids, buying a house and living life on "autopilot". This trip was my wake up call to getting back to the old me, but the 2.0 version, smarter, wiser, different outlook on life and with a few more dollars in the bank to cushion the trip to make it a dream vacation with my family.
We stayed at the Fairmont Orchid, Hawaii. A stunning resort that was worth the every penny. This as a splurge resort for us as we usually do a Disney trip, so we thought why not stay at a high end resort for our family vacation, but stay in a regular room with a garden view as we would see the ocean every day at the beach or by the pool. Step #1 in my living life to the fullest as I have always wanted to see how the other side of life lives staying at really nice hotels. You only live once right? Right, eat, sleep, drink and be merry and do it in Hawaii on the beach.
This trip was also another BIG turning point for me personally. Step #2. I like many other women out there feel not so attractive in the eyes of the media. So I rocked my bad ass self in a bikini. I wore a bikini for the 1st time in public in 15 years. Yes, you read that right. I am no size "0" however I love myself to much not to be a healthy role model for my daughter. I want to her see the beauty in all women, no matter what their size, shape, colour or scars they have. I want her to love who she is inside and out and to love others with the same respect and passion. Love your body and love yourself and the world will keep on turning. Now, at the hot tub I was feeling confident and happy, but that changed in a few seconds after I over heard a man who was getting out of the hot tub look at me and in quite voice thinking I wouldn't hear him say, " Nasty". Well, my heart sunk faster than the Titanic and my confidence was shot and all my self loathing voices came back with a vengeance. I would usually say something back, but his one word made me feel small and ugly. Here I am trying to instill in my daughter confidence and tell her all are beautiful and then there is someone who has no clue who I am say something so cold and mean.
Step #3. I think I look great, I know I rocked it, I know I have a belly, I know I have big thighs, I know I have stretch marks and cellulite, but I am still beautiful, strong, intelligent and brave, I had my pity party for 1 for 2 minutes. I gave myself time to process what had just happened. In the end my resolve was that he was the " Nasty" one not me. I'm living my life to the fullest!
Photo by S.Lutzer
Living life to the fullest is facing your fears, your doubts, your own self loathing and battling the ugly world out there. It's doing things you thought you couldn't do. Its wearing a bikini for the 1st time in 15 years, it's building up the courage to shake off the rude people in the world. Love who you are, your flaws, your individual beauty. Be a role model to someone, be fierce, be bold, be fabulous, be sexy, be funny, be YOU!!! So put your toes in the sand, soak up the sun and drink a Mai Tai, they are amazing!! Be Naturally Your True Self and the world will keep on rolling.
Photo by S.Lutzer
Love,
Me.
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